Are You Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places?

Are you able to find the love you want? Do you worry that you are looking for love in all the wrong places?

In today’s world, so many people struggle to find love. It seems illusive and hard to find.

Why can’t we just open our hearts and find all the love we want? Perhaps we are asking the wrong questions.

Read on to find out why so many of us struggle to find love.

Why can’t we find love?

There are many reasons people struggle to find the love they want. Today we are going to look at two common issues.

  • We are looking outside ourselves for love.
  • Our hearts are too broken to feel the love.

The idea for this post came from Don Miguel Ruiz. In Mastery of Love, he says, “In your heart is all the love you need.” He goes on to say, “What makes you happy is love coming out of you.”

When love works in your life happiness follows.

Looking in all the wrong places

We have been taught to look outside ourselves to find love. We will be happy when we find that special person who will love us. Then we will know we are lovable. So, we keep looking and when another relationship fails, we are devastated. But we keep picking up the pieces and trying again.

What if you had another option? Could you find love in your heart?

Finding love in your heart can seem like a difficult task. Start by learning to accept yourself. Ruiz says, “If you accept your own body, you can accept almost everyone and almost everything.” This is the first step. Start by accepting one small thing about yourself, perhaps a part of your body or a facet of your personality. Keep adding more, accepting more of you.

As a small child you accepted yourself. The adults in your life taught you to judge yourself. Self judgement is the source of much suffering in the world.

The reward for self-acceptance is high. Ruiz says, “Once we are able to accept ourselves just the way we are, everything can start changing from that point forward.”

Your heart is too wounded

Maybe your heart has been broken too many times. You give up or you decide to settle for less than you deserve. Neither of these options will give you what you want.

If your heart has been broken too many times, you don’t need to give up. You can mend your broken heart. You don’t need to relive all the painful memories from your past. You have another option.

There are two ways of looking at your life. Your left brain sees the events that happened and keeps track of the “facts”. Your right brain is more interested in meaning and the emotions connected to an event.

If you want to heal your broken heart, you will want to communicate with your right brain. Your right brain communicates in a different language. Don’t worry. You are already fluent in this language. Every night when you dream you are listening to your right brain. This part of you speaks in metaphors, stories, and images.

When you say “My heart was broken” or “I have the weight of the world on my shoulders” or “That story warmed my heart”, you are speaking the language of the right brain.

The poetry of emotion process guides you through a three step process that opens the door to communicating with your right brain and healing emotional wounds.

By accepting yourself and healing your broken heart, you will discover that your heart is overflowing with love.

To read more about the poetry of emotion process, click on “Are you new to the site?

Leave me a comment below. I would love to hear from you.
(Image: Vicki DeLoach @ Flickr)

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