Do you have too many negative people in your life? Do people in your life hold you back or bring you down? It seems like negative people are everywhere.
Thank you e-mail
Last week a client sent me a thank-you e-mail and I want to quote part of it. “In my view, I am a cleaner, lighter being in my core as a result of your work. Because of this new lightness my world has become cleaner with less negative people and more of the positive ones. Being a better person starts way deep inside…”
Can changing your emotions change the people in your life?
When we make friends, we are looking for people who feel right to us – people who can share our emotions. If we are angry we are attracted to angry people. If we are happy we are attracted to other happy people.
Negative people usually have negative emotions. Negative emotions include fear, anger, shame, and unhealthy guilt. Negative beliefs include not feeling good enough and feeling unlovable.
We all want to feel understood
We want people who can relate to us. We choose people who can understand our pain and our wounds. Sometimes we bond through these wounds. Our wounds are often old emotions from childhood that we are still holding onto. If you want to read more about how we hold on to emotions from childhood click here.
The mirror effect
The people around us are reflecting our emotions even the ones we have disowned or stuffed. They are showing us who we really are at the deepest levels. This is sometimes called the mirror effect.
One easy way to think about the mirror effect is to think in terms of energy. Every emotion has a vibration. When you meet someone who has emotions like yours, you might say “we are on the same wave link” or “we are in sync.” You feel that you match. You have the same emotional energy.
This may not be easy to hear, but if you are attracting a lot of negative people into your life, then at some level you are holding onto negative emotions.
A great side effect
My client’s initial goal with the poetry of emotion process was to create more success in his life. He discovered that some of the side effects were even more important. One great side effect of reclaiming your true self is that your relationships change for the better.
Sometimes your relationships improve or those negative people just disappear from your life. If you are having a great life, you no longer want to spend time complaining about your problems or your boss or the economy. You have better things to do with your time.
How do negative people affect you? Do you join them or do you run for the hills?
To read more…
Image: mdanys @ Flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/mindaugasdanys/3766009204/